Congratulations! You are entering one of the most exciting adventures there is in life.

After your child is born, you will trade your title as a “First-time father” for a more experienced “father”. Within no time l you will be changing diapers and burping your baby like a well-trained pro! While your spouse is pregnant, however, there can be a few unexpected pregnancy changes that might surprise you. There are more things to take into consideration now, like finances.

How much does a baby even cost?

How about your spouse’s body?

Things will surely be a little different now that she has a human being growing inside her stomach, don’t you think? While her body is physically growing the baby, her hormones are changing as well. So, she might not be the easy laid-back gal you know.

Here are a few things you, daddy-to-be, can expect while your spouse is pregnant. Buckle up, Dad, it is going to be an exciting (and definitely ‘bumpy’) ride!

Figure 1. Source: https://pixabay.com/photos/map-car-toy-road-trip-ford-bronco-2530069/

So She Is Growing a Bump…

During the first trimester, you won’t see much of a baby bump in your spouse. But there are a lot of changes taking place within her. From the get-go, her pregnancy hormones produce much more estrogen and progesterone. As the levels of these hormones rise, you can expect your spouse to be nauseous and more emotional than usual. She will also urinate more often and frequently go to the bathroom, even during the night. She might experience food cravings like peanut butter and pickles sandwiches. Be ready to hit the road when she feels particularly “munchy” at 1 am! In the second trimester, you will see a baby bump growing steadily in the next few weeks.

According to the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, she will be gaining 1-2 pounds every week from the second trimester to the end of pregnancy^[1]. Here is a life-saving tip for you – praise and compliment your spouse throughout the pregnancy. Comments like “Wow, you’re huge!” will not be helpful to your spouse and definitely not to you.

How About Sex?

With all the changes taking place in your partner’s body, you may be wondering if and how this would affect your sexual intimacy. Studies show that in a healthy pregnancy with no complications, sex is safe^[2]. This means that you only have to avoid sex when your medical practitioner advises you to do so.

Although studies give the go-ahead, there are a few things you must know when it comes to sexual intimacy during pregnancy. In the first trimester, your partner might feel nauseous and not at all in the mood for intimacy. Her breasts might be swollen and tender. So, the best practice is to talk about what feels okay and what form of stimulation might not be comfortable during intercourse.

In the second trimester, you will want to refrain from using the missionary position, or any position where your partner lies flat on her back. From 24 weeks gestational age, when laying flat on her back, a major blood vessel gets compressed reducing blood flow to the uterus. This is a good time to change things up and experiment with different positions. Although sex might look a little different, it can still be enjoyable and a very precious bonding time for you and your partner. Be adaptable and have grace with her and yourself.

Get That Piggy Bank Ready

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Figure 2. Source: https://pixabay.com/photos/piggy-bank-money-savings-financial-970340/

Not to give you a heart attack, but you might want to sit down for the next paragraph or two. According to the Peterson-Kaiser Family Foundation (KFF), giving birth in the US can be a pricey outing. The estimated cost of giving birth is about $18,865 on average^[3]! So, you might want to check your health insurance plan before the health bills start stacking up. The cost of birth varies from country to country. The price difference between a vaginal birth, C-section, and home birth also varies significantly.

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How expensive are children?

How about the expenses of raising a child? Well, data shows that a child can cost you up to $17,000 a year, according to a Brookings Institution analysis^[4]. Remember that the above-mentioned figures are only estimated amounts. Your needs will determine your expenses, and some people just don’t need that much to raise children. The bottom line is that you can expect more expenses even during pregnancy. Stocking up on diapers, buying prenatal vitamins, getting the nursery ready…it all adds up.

Figure 2. Source:https://pixabay.com/photos/people-man-adult-hands-child-3120717/

In conclusion, becoming a dad can be overwhelming and there is a lot to take into consideration. The main thing you can expect is change. Everything will change; your spouse’s body, your sexual intimacy, how you spend your money and even YOU will change. However, this is the beauty of engaging in this fatherhood journey. You grow into someone you would have never grown into if you did not have the “Dad” title. So embrace the change, Daddy!

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^[1] Institute Of Medicine, Report Brief May 2009, Weight Gain during Pregnancy: Reexamining the Guideline

^[2] Jones, C., Chan, C., & Farine, D. (2011). Sex in pregnancy. CMAJ : Canadian Medical Association Journal, 183(7), 815-818. https://doi.org/10.1503/cmaj.091580

^[3] https://www.forbes.com/advisor/health-insurance/average-childbirth-cost/

^[4] Brookings. “It’s Getting More Expensive to Raise Children. And the Government Isn’t Doing Much to Help, https://www.brookings.edu/articles/its-getting-more-expensive-to-raise-children-and-government-isnt-doing-much-to-help/